So, Nintendo have realised that the only sure fire sellers on the Wii are Mario related titles, and are exploiting that in their new advertising campaign, with the slogan:

“MARIO – Part of the family since 1985″

Now with the internet and the idea of the “global marketplace”, it’s easy to forget about the 1980′s. I don’t though.

You see, the thing is… Back in the 80′s, unlike in the US where “Nintendo” became synonymous with playing a videogame, and the NES was a huge seller, it really wasn’t in the UK when it was released in 1986 (Not 1985 – That’s when it came out in the US).

We all played games on home computers. The ZX Spectrum and the C64, then migrating to STs and Amigas later… The consoles at the time, the Master System and NES, really didn’t have much market share due to the stranglehold of the home computer market.

Even then, Sega easily outsold Nintendo over here. Mainly due to the fact that Mattel distributed the NES, and sold it as a toy, while Sega’s stuff was sold by Virgin Mastertronic, a company well versed in the UK games market – So much so, Sega bought the company and turned them into Sega Europe at the start of the 16-bit console era.

As the home computer scene died in the early 90′s, and Nintendo finally opened a European branch, sure the SNES made a mark, and sold much better than it’s predecessor, but UK was still behind Sega more, and it stayed that way until the Playstation era.

With 10 or so years of Sony dominance, The N64 and Gamecube were 3rd-placers during their respective generations too.

In fact, it’s only with the Wii, and Nintendo’s marketing to the “Blue Ocean” audience, that has let them achieve a popularity in the UK on par with their great US monopoly with the NES, back in the 80′s.

So, surely, if Nintendo were to make a truthful ad regarding Mario’s place in the UK, shouldn’t it be:

“MARIO – Attempting to be part of your family since 1986″

Update

Someone has mentioned to me that I’ve completely glossed over the handheld market, and that Nintendo have dominated that market since the Game Boy.

Give me a break – Who honestly plays handhelds? You buy one, play it while having a dump a few times, and relegate it to the shelf, gathering dust, in favour of games on a proper TV.

Would you rather this tagline then?

“MARIO – Part of your shitting regime since 1990″

I am embarrassed and ashamed of you.

So Sega do what everyone knew they were going to do 2 weeks ago, and anounce that Project Needlemouse was, indeed, Sonic 4. They release a trailer with all of 3 seconds of gameplay, and what do you do? Whine and complain like bitches.

Sega, for the first time in years, stop making Sonic games that by their own admittance, are aimed at children, in favour of a game aimed at the audience that loved the original 16-bit games, and all you do is fucking nitpick.

“Waahhh waaaahh! They’ve used the modern Sonic design! He’s got the homing attack! His running animation isn’t right! They’re reusing badniks and level designs from the previous games! I’m boycotting this! I’m giving up on the franchise forever!!!!!!1111ONEONEONE”

Shut the fuck up! You sound like spoilt fucking children. The average classic fan is in their mid-twenties or over… Act with a little more fucking maturity!

YOU’VE SEEN 3 FUCKING SECONDS OF GAME FOOTAGE OF A GAME THAT DOESN’T COME OUT FOR 6 MONTHS.

No doubt an opinion like mine will be met by some of these so called “classic fans” telling me I’m just not hardcore enough, that I don’t understand, So let me tell you my history regarding the games:

• I played the first game in 1991 at the age of 16.
• I finished the second game so quickly after release on the morning of “Sonic 2′s Day”, that I was interviewed by the TV show “Gamesmaster” about it.
• Every aspect of all the 16 bit titles are ingrained into my brain to such an extent that I can play them almost on automatic… So when a company like Backbone fuck up the emulation of them, making them play ever so slightly differently, I can fucking tell.

…So nobody ever fucking say that I don’t know my fucking Sonic games.

Sure, be a little cynical about the game, but on the other hand show a little optimism, wait until you see more of the game, and then give Sega a little mature feedback instead of chucking your toys out of the pram.

Because the way it stands at the moment, you don’t fucking deserve this game.